IRSBV Chapter 01

Maomai
Aug 27
5 min read

Chapter 1

In front of the floor-to-ceiling window overlooking the black waters of Malibu.

A thin woman with messy platinum-blonde hair was lying quietly beside the bathtub, one arm draped across her eyes as she breathed shallowly.

She was tall, with sharp features—a woman who looked difficult to approach if you didn’t know her.

And if someone saw her not in a bedroom, not even in a bathroom, but sprawled out across the cold bathroom floor? They’d probably never dare speak to her at all.

“What the hell, Noah.”

Just then, a woman with long black hair down to her waist opened the bathroom door. Clicking her tongue, she looked at the woman called Noah.

“I thought you stormed out of the studio to go somewhere dramatic. But really? Here? Your own bathroom floor?”

Her tone was nagging, but affection was woven through her voice. She sat down beside Noah as if it were the most natural thing.

“Go.”

Noah replied without lowering her arm.

“Why are you pissed again? Didn’t like the sessions? I told you this would happen. You shouldn’t have picked a fight with the bandmates and blown things up like this.”

“I said go.”

"Right. This is how you treat the one person who stuck around."

She chuckled and pulled Noah’s arm down.

Underneath were Noah’s smudged, smoky eyes—swollen, shimmering with tears. But Noah refused to open them. She didn’t want anyone to see.

Anya.

Arkless’s drummer, and the only bandmate who had stayed by her side until the end. Noah didn’t want even Anya to see her this weak.

“You’re upset about the bassist, right? I’ll find you a new one. They were scared of you anyway, so it’s fine—”

“This has nothing to do with them.”

Noah cut her off.

It truly didn’t matter who stood there. A hired session player or even some stray cat from the street would look the same to her right now.

“Then why are you like this?”

“…I can’t sing.”

“You?”

Anya froze, stunned.

This was Noah—frontman and lead singer of Arkless.

The Noah.

“You're messing with me, right? Look, maybe your throat’s just off today. Rest a bit and—”

“I want to be alone, Anya.”

Her fussing only sank Noah’s mood further. She sat up, dragging her hands down her face. Each time, her heavy eye shadow smeared darker across her cheeks.

She didn’t even have the strength to kick Anya out, so she just crawled into the bathtub instead.

That was her sign—when she needed to shut the world out completely. And Anya understood. She gave her one last worried look, then quietly left without pressing further.

The moment the door clicked shut.

Noah curled on her side, hugging her knees tightly.

With her ear pressed against the cold ceramic, memories rose up—vivid, as if she were back on stage, singing.

---

We were never the chosen ones, not even once

We’ve always been the first ones thrown away

But it’s okay

I’ll sink into the water with you

just like this

---

Back in the days when none of them had left, when the four of them still stood together charging across the stage with nothing but trust and joy.

---

'"You get the wave sounds recorded?"

"'Yep. Where's this going again?'

'"Right here—I'll sink into the water with you.'"

"I mean, it works with the lyrics, but why these waves specifically? Couldn't we use anything?'"

That was Mia, Arkless’s guitarist.

Whenever she was doubtful, her gray-green eyes would narrow in frustration.

"Because… I want this moment—us four, feet in the ocean—to stay in the song.”

“Ugh. Creepy, Noah. Gives me goosebumps.”

“Shut up, Rosie. Your pink hair is creepier than anything.”

The bassist, Rosie, pretended to gag. She never could handle sappy moods.

And Noah always shot back that Rosie was the most romantic, sentimental name of all.

“Stop fighting. If Noah weren’t this sentimental, half our songs would never exist.”

“Rockers aren’t sentimental. Noah’s totally disqualified.”

"That lunatic’s possessed by rock itself.”

And Anya would always cut in, smoothing things over.

Noah kept replaying those moments—those days that would never, ever come back.

---

I’ll sink into the water with you

---

She kept whispering just that one line.

The only part of *Sink into the Water* they had all sung together. Even Rosie, who swore she’d never sing, had willingly joined in for the backing vocals.

That was how precious the song was.

The world only remembered it as Arkless’s biggest hit—the track that won them four Grammys. But to them, it wasn’t just a hit.

It was their bond, their love, their solidarity—put into sound.

“Though now… all that’s ancient history.”

Noah let out a bitter laugh.

Ten years had passed since then. Arkless was no longer at its peak, but a fading band.

---

“What? You want to get married?”

“Yeah. I just want to be a wife, a mom. I’m sick of this rootless life.”

"But your talent! There are people who'd kill to have what you have!'"

“Stop, Noah. Not everyone wants to sacrifice their life to music, like you.”

Mia quit, marrying and choosing stability. Once among the top ten guitarists alive, she was now a mother.

---

“Ugh, paparazzi again. These assholes never die.”

“You should be used to it—it’s been over ten years.”

“This life is suffocating. I love music, I love you guys, but seeing them camping outside every day? These trashy rumors about my private life? I can’t.”

"No, Rosie. Mia's already gone. If you leave too..."

"I'm sorry, Noah. I just can't take it anymore"

Rosie, who’d always hated the spotlight, quit too. She disappeared completely—no contact, no trace. Sometimes, only through her mother would news slip through: Rosie wandering the world, untethered.

And so, only Noah and Anya remained.

While Noah collapsed, Anya stood strong as ever, holding Arkless together. No—holding Noah together.

Noah had long since grown tired, wanted to let go. But she kept going, only because she couldn’t bear to disappoint Anya.

Ten years they had dragged on like that.

And now, Noah wanted nothing.

Could do nothing.

Once the composer of every Arkless song, she hadn’t written a single track in years.

She’d barely managed to keep singing—until now. Now, even her voice was gone.

"I don’t ever want to wake up like this again.”

She just wanted to sink into sleep. To dream of the time the four of them stood together again.

Repeating it endlessly in her mind, Noah closed her eyes.

---